A strange sleeping pattern

My eyes don't shut when I want them to.

It's currently 1:16 a.m. in Madrid and I can't sleep. Naturally, I flip my computer open to see what's going on in the world of my American loved ones. Here I am, scanning the ever-superficial Facebook newsfeed, struggling to intake segment of life in los Estados Unidos.

Every time I do this, however, I ask myself, Why? I'm in a completely different country in another corner of the world. Why am I resorting to Facebook to pacify my homesickness? It doesn't do anything other than blind me to what I have right here in this culturally rich city.

Reading updates about family and friends at home is instant gratification, but it can't fill the void that moving away from home leaves. In order to soften the homesick feeling, I should focus on creating a life and identity here, in the moment. Instead of looking upon the past and smiling at memories, I need to embrace the right now with courage in my step.

Maybe my eyes don't shut when I want them to because I need to keep them open. Perhaps it's necessary that I keep my eyes peeled in order to identify any opportunity that presents itself.

I suppose I should sleep with one eye open just in case a once-in-a-lifetime experience threatens to pass me by.

Artwork at El Museo de la Reina Sofía